Question from Lindy C, Kazakhstan.
Kneeling Man: I have a question here from Lindy C, from Kazakhstan.
God: I’ll just briefly take this opportunity, Neel, to say that I never forsook that place, despite what many people say.
KM: Lindy’s not saying anything like that.
God: Okay, good.
KM: She says she was always taught that Jesus was the one way to God, and that me talking to you directly is somehow wrong. Maybe even blasphemous.
God: Different strokes I’d say. You and I get along fine, Neel. Others prefer to go the Jesus way. And of course Jesus is also me, so I’m not sure I understand the question.
KM: I think it might be that she doesn’t fully understand the relationship between you and Jesus. The nuance.
God: Well it’s not really that difficult. I’m the father, Jesus is my son, and also me, and then there’s the Holy Ghost, who is sort of like Jesus’ brother, but without the human bit or a mother, so more like a half brother in that he’s also me.
KM: Do many people pray to the Holy Ghost?
God: Hardly anybody. I’d say if anyone’s having difficulty getting enough face time with me or Jesus, they should give a shout out to the HG.
KM: But if he’s also you, how come he has spare time and you don’t?
God: Because hardly anybody prays to him. More people pray to Jesus’ mum than pray to the HG.
KM: Is Jesus’ mum up there with you?
God: Of course.
KM: What does she do?
God: She keeps an eye out for miracles.
KM: How’s that going?
God: Was that part of Lindy’s question?
KM: No, that was me asking that one.
God: Yes, I know Neel. That slightly subversive edge of yours was showing.
KM: Sorry about that.
God: Was there anything else?
KM: Did you finish answering Lindy’s question?
God: Lindy should pray to Jesus if that makes her feel comfortable. Or the HG, as previously mentioned. As far as her thinking that I could be involved in something blasphemous… well that just makes no sense at all.
KM: Okay. Thanks, God.
God: You’re welcome, Neel. Good night.
Question from Andrew G (13)
Kneeling Man: I’ve got a question for you, God. It’s from Andrew G, he’s thirteen years old.
God: Shoot.
KM: Well that was an unfortunate word choice. He wants to know what he should do if a gunman comes into his classroom?
God: Oops. Sorry about that. That’s a tricky one.
KM: Yep. Glad I don’t have to answer it.
God: It would depend on a few things. You might be able to escape out another door.
KM: It’s a classroom, God. They’ve usually got just the one.
God: It might be an idea to make sure they all have two or three in future.
KM: That’s not really going to help Andrew right now though is it?
God: No, I see your point. If you’re at the back of the room, maybe hiding on the floor would be best. Or… If you were right next to the gunman and could tackle him, maybe that would work. Doesn’t the school have guidelines?
KM: I don’t know. But interesting you should mention the tackle thing because he did also ask that if he tackled a gunman and got killed, would he go to heaven? Even if he hadn’t confessed or prayed for a while?
God: If he’s trying to save people then… yeah, I guess… I don’t see why not… but if he had a suicidal motive… well… I probably need more information really. Did he ask anything else?
KM: No that’s it.
God: Okay then. Until next time.
KM: Thanks, God.