Oi, God!

Beforelife, Life, Afterlife

Posted 27 November 2024 At last the full story –  Every single known fact about the Beforelife and the Afterlife Now available as Full PDF Downloads – Absolutely Free The Human Life Series of Handy Notebooks Terrific gifts for every occasion – especially for your religious friends. Get your FREE PDF versions of The LIFE …

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Question for God from Jim R

Question for God from Jim R : Can you make a rock too big for you to be able to move? Kneeling Man: Oi, God! Are you there? God: Yes, Neel. As always. KM: Jim R has a question for you. God: Uh huh. KM: Jim wants to know if you can make a rock …

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Lucias-question-for-God

Question for God from Lucia

Question for God from Lucia Kneeling Man: Oi, God! Are you there? God: I’m omnipresent, Neel. Why do you keep asking? KM: Just checking. Lucia has a question for you. God: Who the hell is Lucia? KM: You’re asking me? Aren’t you omniscient? God: Just testing. Go ahead. KM: Lucia wants to know why you …

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God and the Human Brain

Not Very Intelligent Design 3

Posted 18 December 2023 At long last God and The Human Brain is done The almost perpetual battle with procrastination and distraction has been won. The war is another matter, but that’s not today’s concern. Not Very Intelligent Design 3 : God and the Human Brain AVAILABLE NOW ! CLICK THIS An excerpt – God. …

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Neel Ingman calls God

God takes Bitcoin? When the Pope tweeted some advice about how to look upon the poor, I noticed that he didn’t include any mention of helping the poor. So I asked God about the Pope’s tweet. Secret spy camera footage of that historic event has now surfaced on YouTube. You can watch it here or, …

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God's Judgement Day

God’s Judgement Day

God’s Judgement Day Kneeling Man: Oi, God! God: What? KM: I’m doing another book. It’s called Not Very Intelligent Design 3 : God and the Human Brain God: Oh for Christ’s sake. KM: I suppose it doesn’t count as blasphemy when you say it? God: I make the rules, Neel. And I decide how they’re …

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Aztec sacrifice blood of lambs

Not Very Intelligent Design Too : Blood of Lambs

Coming soon… Not Very Intelligent Design Too : Planet Earth Kneeling Man: Oi, God! You there? God: Yes, Neel. KM: What made you think it was a good idea to create human virgins and then have other humans kill them and offer them as a sacrifice back to you? Seems a bit like breeding fish …

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God and HG pre-Jesus

God and the Holy Ghost pre-Jesus conversation

God: One day people will refer to this as the famous God and the Holy Ghost pre-Jesus conversation. Holy Ghost: What are you talking about? God: I’m talking about thousands of years from now. In the post-Jesus era. HG: What’s the post-Jesus era? God: You’ll see soon enough, Holy. You’ll see. HG: Anything I can …

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mystery of the cross

Jesus came down on earth the mystery of the Cross

Kneeling Man: Oi, God! You there? God: Yes, Neel. KM:  Jesus came down on earth the mystery of the Cross? “Jesus came down on earth”, what’s that supposed to mean?  Doesn’t the Vatican have any competent translators? Did you see the Pope’s latest tweet? God: I’m omniscient, Neel, I see everything. KM: Of course you …

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Vatican Syndrome

Vatican Syndrome – a variant of Stockholm Syndrome

Leaving the Catholic Church is not usually as difficult as leaving other faith-based organisations, such as Scientology or Islam, where the consequences can be brutal. A Catholic doesn’t have to renounce Christianity in order to leave the church. There are many non-Catholic Christian churches that will happily welcome ex-Catholics. A Catholic could also decide to …

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Criminal Solicitations

When was the Catholic Church NOT a Haven for Pedophiles?

When was the Catholic Church NOT a Haven for Pedophiles? Kneeling Man: Oi, God! You there? God: Of course, Neel. KM: Right, stick your fingers in your ears and bugger off, you’re not going to want to hear this. God: What? KM: Piss off, I’m not in a good mood. This is a rant and …

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pope cannibal

Pope stimulated by the fragrance and flavour of Jesus

Is the Pope too enthusiastic about the flavour of Jesus Christ’s flesh? Kneeling Man: The flavour of Jesus. Holy shit. Oi, God, you there? God: Sure am, Neel. As always. KM: I was concerned a while back when the Pope talked about becoming sexually aroused by faeces, but I think his enthusiasm about the flavour …

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Pearly gates

Not Very Intelligent Design in heaven? Better ask God

Not Very Intelligent Design in heaven? Kneeling Man: Oi, God! Does your will being done on earth, as it is in heaven, include Not Very Intelligent Design  in heaven? God: An insult with your very first question? That’s not very nice, Neel. Had a tough day? Kneeling Man: Nothing five or six drinks can’t take …

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socrates testicles

Not Very Intelligent Design? Socrates vs Testicles

Testicles swinging in the breeze – intelligent design? Kneeling Man: Oi, God, I found some pictures of Testicles in an encyclopedia. I think maybe I should have put them in my new book, Not Very Intelligent Design. God: Uh huh. KM: They’re about things from way back in the day before your son, the sweet, …

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The Not Very Intelligent Design of Knees

Knees – the weakest link? Kneeling Man: Oi, God, I just realised I didn’t put quite enough about knees in my new book, Not Very Intelligent Design. God: Really? I think you said more than enough about everything, quite frankly. KM: When it comes to knees, I understand why you stuffed up. God: I don’t …

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Making Shit Up Isn’t The Problem

Making shit up is fine, saying it’s true isn’t Kneeling Man: Oi, God, are you there? No? Doesn’t matter. I’m in the mood for a rant, not a conversation.   KM: Horses stand around in paddocks wondering what the fuck’s going on. Then they stop wondering, look down and eat grass. This goes on until …

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One Way One Truth

One Way One Truth One Jesus One God Kneeling Man: Oi, God, what happened to that old One Way Jesus with the pointy finger thing? God: Did something happen to it? KM: I don’t hear it so much these days. In fact the last time I heard it was a guy at an airport over …

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Spouse of Mary aka St Joseph the Cuckold Day

Spouse of Mary aka St Joseph the Cuckold Kneeling Man: Oi, God, your boy’s on fire today. Jamming a whole shitload of piss-takes into one little tweet. God: What are you talking about, Neel? KM: Best wishes to fathers? God: Yeah, and? KM: Well he wasn’t a father was he, old Joseph? He was a …

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Educating an act of love, giving life

Pope thanks all who teach in Catholic schools Kneeling Man: Oi, God, what’s this shit? Educating an act of love, giving life? Could almost be a description of fornication, no? You’d think he’d be more careful about this sort of thing. What with all the pedophile priest business. God: You think he’s thanking teachers who …

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Monkeys in the Image of God

Monkeys in the Image of God Kneeling Man: Oi, God, Ken’s hamming it up again. I think he doth protest a bit much. I mean a quick glance at Ken Ham’s face is enough to see the family resemblance. If you didn’t make Monkeys in the image of God, why did you make Ken Ham …

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